Department of the Tragically Absurd: A New Structure for Arab Joint Action on the Table

It's Got to Hurt When Only a Few Recognize Your Completely Imaginary Genius

As Emirates 24/7 informs us:

Chairing the opening session, the Libyan President Colonel Muammar Al Gaddafi welcomed the Arab leaders and said that the summit would discuss a new structure for Arab joint action.

He added that a five-member committee under his chairmanship was formed during the last summit in Sirte to oversee implementation of the new structure.

Another decisive step forward.  A new structure.  Proven visionary leadership.  What could possibly go wrong?  (For one thing see picture above).  

Who could possibly object?

Amr Moussa voiced some skepticism and warned that steps should not be taken which would undermine the highly effective Arab League.

But as the report tells us several critical breakthroughs were made at the meeting:

HH Sheikh Mohammed Al Maktoum had several very important visits.

1. He visited Egyptian President Mohamed Husni Mubarak on Sunday for a session filled with Hope.
2. He met with Syrian President Bashar Al Asad also on Sunday.  While we're not told,, I believe this session was about Change. (Quite a busy day, it seems).
3. On Saturday the Bahraini Deputy Prime Minister and his entourage visited HH  and his entourage and conveyed the greetings of King Hamad of Bahrain!  That was, if I'm not mistaken. one of the major achievements of the conference.
4. Though there were no doubt many more,  perhaps more than could be recorded.  One of note,  that was, was a visit to a heritage market.

This event certainly lived up to its billing as the  extraordinary Arab summit.

Despite the many imaginary achievements of this remarkable event, I am left with one nagging doubt.  What sort of people make a habit of indulging a psychotic in his delusions?

Update - Republican Senate Candidate Admits to Dabbling in Witchcraft

If you're worried, don't be.

Luckily the Republican Governor of Louisiana is a home-schooled exorcist.

Idiocy Knows No Borders: Mice with Human Brains

Hidden Camera Picture from Inside NIH Laboratories

Well, just when you thought you'd heard everything, something new pops up.

The Republican candidate (who else of course) for Senate from the great state of Delaware apparently rang the warning tocsin of a manifest danger to our nation back in 2007.  Sadly though it appears no one heeded her:

"They are -- they are doing that here in the United States. American scientific companies are cross-breeding humans and animals and coming up with mice with fully functioning human brains. So they're already into this experiment."

Now I suspect many of you out there are wondering if this could possibly be true.  I'd point out that Ms. O'Donnell made her remarks on Bill O'Reilly's show.  And if that doesn't settle the issue for you, I'm not sure what other arguments would.

One thing we can be sure of from this story though is that we have pretty conclusive proof that scientists have been successful in their efforts to cross-breed humans with mice brains.  I think Ms. O'Donnell's words speak for themselves.

You may also be wondering who "they" are.  I'd tell you but I'm pretty sure I can here the very faint "whump, whump" of the black helicopters circling overhead   I did ask the real estate agent if we were outside the range of the UN spy satellites.  She assured me we would be.  But I guess she didn't know or, perhaps, may have been in on the plot.  

 Outside my window, right now.

Additional posting may be delayed today.  I'm going to nip out to the local store.  While I did line my enormous tarboush with tin foil last week, I think it's time I put tin foil on the walls around the area in which I blog.  One can't be too safe. 

If  I don't post again, well you'll know what happened. 

And for God's sake keep your eyes open for mice on bicycles!

Threat to Capitalism Warning Notice: Regulatory Overkill Again

No sooner had I begun to relax than I read of another manifest danger.  No, it's not ill-conceived regulations of the financial sector as one concerned bank CEO calls them.

It's regulatory overkill for offshore drilling.

In today's FT the Lex column thundered:

Regulatory overkill after BP's drilling accident has understandably soured the mood.

I've boldfaced two words from the quote.  A "drilling accident".  Sounds benign.  A company dedicated to "best practice" and with a highly environmentally friendly logo is drilling and for some unexplained reason there's an accident.  Probably not their fault at all.  Hard to see what all the fuss is about.

On the front page of the FT in an article hysterically titled "BP Cited for Safety Lapses on North Sea", I did learn that the newspaper had filed a request under the UK's Freedom of Information Act and learned that:

"All but one of BP's five North Sea installations inspected in 2009 were cited for failure to comply with emergency regulations on oil spills, raising questions about the company's ability to manage a disaster in the area."

Now some of you cynics out there might use this information to criticize the good folks at BP.  You might say the instead of describing the Gulf of Mexico as an accident, this bit of information suggests criminal negligence.

I for one look at this last bit of news with a less condemning eye.

1. If there's an accident here, it's likely relating to the one out of the five wells in the North Sea.  BP has a pretty consistent record.  Besides preparation for disasters is a waste of shareholder funds, because in well managed operations disasters never occur.
2. BP's disaster management abilities (or lack thereof) have been pretty well demonstrated and documented.  There's really no need to raised questions now to which we already have the answer.  The information obtained by the FT is therefore not explosive (at least in a news worthy sense).  

It's high time that pointy-headed bureaucrats in Washington and in London get off the back of the financial and oil industries.

They've demonstrated a remarkable rhetorical capacity for imaginary self-regulation.  It's time to end regulatory overkill.  Next thing you know there could be crackpot schemes for food or mining safety!  All this could wind up killing our very way of life.  That is, of course, if you're able to continue living after an economic and environmental collapse, assuming you didn't die from food poisoning first.

Idiocy Knows No Borders: Terrorist Babies

You may recall, if you're prepared to think some very scary things, how Dan Maes revealed that his opponent in the Republican primary for Governor of Colorado was under the influence of the United Nations and promoting programs (bicycle riding and recycling) which posed a manifest danger to our very way of life. Luckily for our embattled Republic, Mr. Maes will be representing the Republican Party in the general election - the UN's plan in Denver having been dealt a hopefully fatal blow.

But dangers abound.  Stepping forward with the latest warning is Representative Louie Gohmert, Republican, Texas who asserts in the following clip future terrorist babies are being born right here in America by illegal aliens, spirited back home for the necessary training and indoctrination, and then to be later infiltrated back to conduct their nefarious operations.   

While the good Representative did not provide conclusive proof of his warning, I think he did conclusively demonstrate that Idiocy Knows No Borders - a perhaps even more imminent and critical threat to the USA.

You Said What?: Sue Myrick "The Iranians are Coming"

Well the thing that concerns me, and you mentioned this briefly, Iran is working with Venezuela. And they're transiting through Venezuela, taking Spanish for maybe six months. They're getting the false documents that they need, coming up through Mexico and if they're stopped, they just say well I'm Spanish. And it, oh I mean Mexican, and it only takes a smart border agent who knows the difference in the accents. He can tell, but if he doesn't have that, there's no way to know.

And the other thing that we're seeing, and we're seeing it in your state in particular in the prisons is Farsi tattoos. Farsi is basically a Persian language, which Iran is, and we know we've seen Arabic tattoos in our prisons for a long time, but we haven't seen Farsi tattoos in a long time. That's a pretty good indication that these people coming across our border are not just coming from Mexico and other countries that are looking for work. And that's what scares me. Being on Intelligence, we know there are people who are are here who do want to do us harm who are already in the country and it's not a matter of will they get in anymore, it's a matter of they're already here because of our lax border laws.

Well, as I'm sure you'll agree, this is mighty disturbing.  Rather sophisticated Iranians - capable of learning Spanish in six months - are infiltrating our country.  The only thing that stands between "them" and "us" are the language skills of our border patrol.  If they can't tell a Mexican or Spanish accent from  a Farsi  one, we're in for big trouble.

Of course, if they have those "Farsi tatoos", I suppose that would be another way to catch them.  Though I have to admit it's unclear why they would have these tattoos.  Wouldn't that undermine their clever disguises?

And if they're in jail, haven't we already caught them? Or is this a diabolical plan to take over our prisons?  And what greater threat to our nation?  For what more symbolizes a nation than its prisons? 

Perhaps, convenience stores?  And there's another threat lurking there.  And it isn't Apu.

After all this AA is pretty scared but not more than by two chilling facts:

1. Representative Myrick has represented the 9th Congressional District in North Carolina since 1995 .
2. She has a seat on the House Intelligence Committee.

I'm hoping the name signifies the Committee works to raise the intelligence level of its members.  No Representative left behind, no matter how far back he or she starts out.

Idiocy Knows No Borders: When You Worship Guns, It's Just Natural

Representative Henry Burns

If you need an armed guard to protect you from fellow worshippers in your mosque, synagogue or church,  that may be a sign that it's time to find another house of worship.  

As part of the debate on this bill, which has been approved (this is America after all), one Representative raised an interesting point.

Rep. Charmaine Marchand Stiaes, D-New Orleans, said that when armed congregants shoot at an attacker, "nine out of 10 times they will hit a constituent of the  church and not the person they were looking for."

I guess down there in Waziristan, excuse me,  Louisiana there are enough shootings in churches to come up with these statistics. 9 out of 10.  Not 7 out of 10.   The answer is clearly  mandatory marksmenship lessons as part of Sunday school.

And perhaps the most telling quote of all .....

Under federal law, people who pose a heightened risk of violence cannot buy or own firearms, including convicted felons, domestic abusers, the seriously mentally ill and several other categories. Suspected terrorist is not one them.

Individuals on the government’s terrorist watch list can be barred from boarding airplanes, but not from purchasing high-powered guns or explosives.

Several attempts have been made to pass a bill to correct this error.  If you know the USA, you know that we love our guns.  The bill has repeatedly failed.

The National Rifle Association has come out more than once four square on the terrorists' constitutional right to "bear arms" and explosives as well.    It is they believe the original intent of the Founders.

Idiocy Knows No Borders: Virginia Attorney General Cracks Down on Pornographic State Seal

 

Fully Clothed and Wholesome Seal Shown Above

The Commonwealth of Virginia's fearless and crusading Attorney General, Ken Cuccinelli, has struck a decisive blow for decency and morality in the Commonwealth.  Not since John Ashcroft has a public servant taken so needed a step.

Seems that the Great Seal of the Commonwealth was pornographic.  It was almost as big a moral threat as those two hijabless members of the Majlis AlUmma in Kuwait.  And while not perhaps rising to the same level as the manifest danger of provocative manikins in the malls of Bahrain that were according to the wise solons in the Bahrain lower chamber leading the callow youth of the nation (males) astray, it was nonetheless a major danger to society.

Note:  Since this is a family site, I have refrained from posting the previous pornographic logo.  Those overcome with prurience can find it at the link above. Shame on you!

While it's hard not to applaud this step, one thing is troubling me.  The figure depicted in the Great Seal is the Roman pagan goddess Victus. Can the war on Christmas have started early this year? Is Brother Ken a foot solider in this endeavor?

Drill, Baby, Drill

CAUSE #1  - Simple Minded Politics

CAUSE #2 - Simple Minded Regulation

By 2003, U.S. regulators decided remote-controlled safeguards needed more study. A report commissioned by the Minerals Management Service said "acoustic systems are not recommended because they tend to be very costly." 

An acoustic trigger costs about $500,000, industry officials said. The Deepwater Horizon had a replacement cost of about $560 million, and BP says it is spending $6 million a day to battle the oil spill. On Wednesday, crews set fire to part of the oil spill in an attempt to limit environmental damage.

That's right an acoustic trigger would have cost BP US$500,000!  Not only did BP not install one, it apparently didn't buy any oil spill insurance.  Perhaps two very strong arguments why one shouldn't rely on the "free market" to provide protection.

EFFECT

Idiocy Knows No Borders: Guide Dog Denied Access to Restaurant Due to Imagined Sexual Preference

You cannot make this stuff up.

At least I suppose an earthquake may have been avoided.

Idiocy Knows No Borders: The Great Microchip Danger

At times of national danger, it's particularly comforting to know that there are those out there ever vigilant to manifest threats to our way of life and wise enough to develop workable solutions.

The Georgia Legislature has stepped up to take decisive action to criminalize the involuntary implanting of microchips in its citizens.

And from the testimony of the lady in the article apparently not a moment too soon.

Three troubling thoughts though:

1. If evildoers out there (if I may be allowed to coin a term) decide to plant a microchip in the unsuspecting citizen, is a misdemeanor penalty likely to deter them?
2. If fact since the crime is involuntary implantation, won't that just lead them (and if you have to ask who "they" are, well you may already have been implanted) to refine their mind control techniques?
3. The two main sponsors of the bill are Majority Leader "Chip" Rogers and "Chip" Pearson.  And that is perhaps the most troubling fact of all.  And may be the only fact in relation to this bill.

Idiocy Knows No Borders: The Manifest Danger of Women's Football

Several MPs in Kuwait have discovered a fundamental threat to Kuwaiti civilization and Islam.  

No, it's not misleading practices in the Kuwaiti stock market, where unwary retail investors are periodically sheared like sheep, nor a woeful lack of ethics in the conduct of business that has led to the looting of many a company and banks being stuck with duff loans, nor is it corruption where the wealth of the country is whistled away.  

No, it's something much more serious.  It is women's football!

But the Reform and Development Party has taken one of its usual principled stands against this dire threat.  

As a side note, we've got to find the guy who named this group the  "Reform" and "Development" Party.  I would have thought in a rich country like Kuwait dictionaries would be available.    

As JD Hayworth will not doubt helpfully point out, first comes women's football, then the next thing you know there will be music lessons in schools, and then it end with camels marrying horses.   Or watchmen on farms ....

I suspect a constitutional amendment to ban burning of the Kuwaiti flag might just forestall collapse -  if it's not too late already.

Idiocy Knows No Borders: Start a Hedge Fund From Your Garage

Copyright Yann  GNU Free Documentation License,

A whole new meaning to the financial term "get taken for a ride".

The investors' due diligence must have been great on this HF, particularly the questions on the professional background and competence of the principals of the firm.

Idiocy Knows No Borders: القذافي يدعو الى "الجهاد" ضد سويسرا

All one has to do is see his name to know where to file the Brother Leader's comments.

BBC report here.

Idiocy Knows No Borders: Missouri Gets Its Budget Priorities Straight

The Kansas City Star reports on the legislature's "wise" moves to deal with the budget deficit.  

Cut educational spending.  

But don't touch the tax exemption for yachts.

I wonder if "Boss Tom" would have supported the measure?

Idiocy Knows No Borders: South Carolina Takes the Initiative On Two Key Issues

 

I am advised by a highly reliable source that I have my facts wrong.  That this law was passed in 1951 or thereabouts.  And that actually it has re-emerged because once again the SCL is attempting to repeal it.

The original erroneous post is being left here as

1. a public service to readers to remember not to believe everything you read
2. a personal lesson in humility to AA
3. an apology to the SCL

BTW I understand there is a Supreme Court Decision which effectively overturns this law:  Yates v United States (1957).

As many of you out there know, these are both dangerous and financially challenging times.

Two of the key issues that the United States of America faces are:

1. International and domestic terrorism
2. Budgetary shortfalls particularly at the state and local level.

Finding a solution to one of these would be quite an accomplishment.

Finding a solution to both of these really remarkable.

Finding a single solution to both - that would apparently be genius.

In another demonstration of unbounded innovation and competence. the Legislature and Executive of the Great State of South Carolina have stepped up with just such a solution in the form of Chapter 29 "The Subversive Activities Registration Act"  to Title 23 "Law Enforcement and Public Safety" of the South Carolina Code of Laws.

This clever piece of legislation requires that every subversive organization (and that would include not just terrorists by the way) must register with the Secretary of State of South Carolina  (Section 23-29-50.)  Failure to do so results in penalties of a fine of not more than US$25,000 and up to ten year's imprisonment (Section 23-29-90).

With penalties like these, it's pretty clear that subversive organizations in the Great State of South Carolina have a strong incentive to register.  And judging by the South Carolina Legislature's focus on this issue, you know it's got to be a serious problem in their state.  Once subversives are registered, of course, it will be very easy to keep track of them.  And, if necessary, to arrest them.  And since they've filled out a form stating that they are subversives bent on the violent overthrow of the Government of the United States and perhaps even more importantly that of the Great State of South Carolina, judicial proceedings should be facilitated.

But there's more to the genius behind this bill.  It has a revenue enhancement aspect.  When registering with the Secretary of State, each subversive agent will pay a US$5.00 fee.   I'm guessing that this initiative might well mean that South Carolina won't need any stimulus money from the US Federal Government.  After all, one would certainly not imagine that the solons of South Carolina would waste time if this weren't a serious problem.

If you are a subversive residing in the State of South Carolina or have a loved one, friend or acquaintance who is, please urge them to register.  They have only 30 days "after coming into existence in South Carolina" to do so.  

As a public service, here is a copy of the official form for registration.

Idiocy Knows No Borders: And Then Again Sometimes It is Bounded

 

Courtesy State of Utah State Senate Website

Here's a gem from the LA Times.

I haven't checked to see if there is a full moon, but then again I am far geographically but apparently not spiritually from the Great State of Utah.

But he's a guy with a million ideas.  A veritable "party of ideas" one might say.  Here's another gem.

Manifest Absurdity: The Christian (?) God

Proving once again that idiocy knows no borders, the FT published an article 13 January in which FT correspondent, Kevin Brown in Singapore, states:  "The roots of the conflict lie in an Umno decision three years ago when, as part of a licensing regime through which the government controls the mainstream media, but not the internet, the home minister barred the Herald from using the arabic word Allah to describe the Christian God." (Emphasis mine).

While I cannot produce either my long form or short form Doctor of Divinity degree, I think it is fairly commonly accepted that the same God was involved with Moses, Jesus, and Mohammed.  That I believe is pretty much what is taught in the Quran.  The Christian Bible also holds that the God of the Old Testament is the same One as the New Testament.

I suppose if I had an open mind I might ask if there was a Catholic God distinct from say the Lutheran One.

And has anyone out there ever wondered if  Catholics in France have a different One than those in the USA.  After all the French refer to "their" God as Dieu, while we in the States call Him by His proper name, God.   And what pray tell are we to make of the  Russians' name for God?